Pagoda of Gaming

Let’s hop to it!

The first thing I found I actually grabbed late last night, I’ve got a Warhammer double for you. First up is the new trailer for Space Marine, which you can see HERE. I’m really excited for this game as it has the opportunity to show the awesomeness of the 40K universe from a very unique perspective – and tell an awesome story at the same time. It’s looking like a Gears of War and God of War mash up on the Third Person Action Genre, but sadly I think it won’t make a 2010 release date.

Secondly there’s the unveiling teaser trailer for “Warhammer 40,000: Dark Millennium Online” – which may very well be the best MMO name ever. And you can catch the trailer right HERE. There’s very little we can gleam from this trailer: We know there’s going to be vehicle combat of some kind, and you can see that the Art style is spot on for the franchise – but I’m seeing elements of RTS and Third Person Shooting in there. I dug around a little more and the developer’s site says we’ll find out more in August at the gamescom show. It also reminded me that I really should sit down and play Darksiders some time – which was Vigil Games’ first project.

Hidden in the pile of new game videos is a short teaser for the first Alan Wake DLC, and it confirms that this new content will continue the character’s story, and throw in some new gameplay elements for good measure. You can check that trailer HERE, though a die-hard spoiler free Alan Wake fan would just take my word for it.

In addition to the new information we got a couple of days ago – that blizzard are going back on their word for a lot of already previewed things for the Cataclysm Expansion. We get a look at some new footage from the revamped capital cities. Orgrimmar is looking super-swanky. Check it out HERE. I must say, I’m a little disappointed in some of the stuff they cut from the expansions – but I guess you’ve just got to trust that blizzard is going to put out another quality product.

Massively’s got a new trailer for Black Prophecy – and it continues being a game that looks like it’s more fun than eve, but possibly lacking somewhat in depth. I did lol a little when the trailer touts “Dramatic Cutscenes” as one of it’s bullet points – but it’s pretty epic. I suppose the greatest surprise to myself is that the game is at some capacity “Free to Play”. It also makes me really want to buy a flight stick for my PC.

Kotaku and Giantbomb are both reporting that there’s a Fallout MMO Beta sign up site out there – but it looks a little shady to me, along the lines of “we’re going to pretend to be you and get a bunch of credit cards”. It’s only Day 1 proper of E3 now, so I’ll wait to reserve some judgement, but I’d really like to see some game before I put some deets into a shady URL. “Fallout-on-line.com” – yeah, I find it odd that they couldn’t get something a little less dash-less.

In the Epic Fail category we get a first look at Magic the Gathering Tactics (not sure where to put the colon in that name) from WotC and SOE. Quite frankly, if Wizards can’t make an acceptable digital carbon copy of the original game, they shouldn’t be allowed to make video games PERIOD. I mean for fucks sake – it doesn’t even use pictures of the cards – isn’t that kinda the point? And thank you very much for the revolting modelling. Massively – for some reason (I didn’t hear it was an MMO) has the scoop right HERE.

Ubisoft is dropping some knowledge about Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood’s multiplayer in a new trailer as seen HERE. It features an interesting assassination mode that reminds me of the not too old to forget game/source engine mod “The Ship”. Seems pretty cool, and not removed too far from the main tenants of the franchise’s single player component. Still no proper details on the game’s Co-op modes.

In another trailer, RIGHT HERE, Bungie unveils to no surprise that Firefight will return in Halo Reach. I don’t truly know how cool this is – because *EMOFACE* I couldn’t find any bros to play with in ODST. However through this trailer we get a sweet confirmation of the return of the Bubble shield in some capacity and MAC Cannon support – think hugely destructive Battlefield style airstrikes – or rather “Spacestrikes”

News from the show has been rather lacking on the APB front, but Realtime Worlds has announced that for the open beta players will receive an additional 5 hours of gametime in the action districts. And Massively’s got a rather estute impressions article up which you should check out if you are interested in the game right HERE. I’m a little worried that the game wasn’t talked about at the EA Conference to be honest – you think that they’d want to pimp the game out a little – infact MMO’s weren’t really talked about at all at any of the press Conferences were they? Hrmmm…

Anyhoos – that’s what I’ve trawled from the internet over the past 24 hours. I’ll be back tomorrow with more news and crap from E3 2010. Now I’m off to cool the fuck down. It’s really hot in here AND I’VE ALREADY TAKEN OFF ALL MY CLOTHES.

‘Nin Out!

So let’s start with a funny video. It’s been a while since I’ve heard of any awesome anti-scientology raids via our anonymous friends. This video, uploaded in January of this year, is a masterpiece of disruption and lulz. The concept is simple - take a willing operative, dubbed ‘Brave Agent Pubit’, strip him of his shirt, lather the motherfucker in vaseline and then spread upon him hairs from the netherest of regions. Then set him loose upon the reception area of a nearby Scientology base. Accompany that with recordings of prank calls and a heartfelt ballad and we’ve got some luls, I urge you to check it out:

Next up is a look at Halo ODST, which showcases the cast of the game. Indeed, there is about half the cast of Firefly in there, including Nathan Fillion’s facial likeness. The game looks like it’s going to bring a much needed boost of emotion and personality to the franchise Not that the Cheif isn’tThe ‘Cheif is more of a pure Icon.
Fat Princess came out last week for the low price of £12. I got my mitts on it and played through the story mode (which I highly recommend to new players) but I haven’t really sunk my teeth in due to being very good-TV-less this past while. When I’m moved back into my room - when it has curtains again and the TV doesn’t face the burning rage of the sun - I’ll give it a better shot.

A new trailer for EVE Online has hut, and it’s probably the best 2-minute explanation of the game CCP has ever given. Watching it made me almost re-sub, but then I remembered that Ambulation, their future patch that will let me open and run my own “Barcadium” has been put on hold. Here’s the trailer.

Speaking of MMO’s, my Beta Key for Champions Online has arrived and I’m currently downloading. I’m oddly excited for a round of super-heroism, after reading Superman Red Son the other night, I’ve found more substance in that side of the Comic genre than I thought I would. I’ve always been a batman guy, but beyond him I’ve always thought it was a little too much. Consider me surprised, though I’m not going to run out and grab me some Green Lantern, that dude’s just silly. Ryan Scott, of GFW fame, has a good preview up of Champions over HERE, if you’re interested. And I’ll be posting my non-bannable impressions as I play along.

The Matrix Online is officially dead. I was very interested in playing it at launch all those years ago, but after seeing the grind the game presented and the cryptic gameplay mechanics, I shelved it. It’s a shame because it did have some pretty good ideas. You can see the last hour of the game’s life HERE over on Giant Bomb. The final message broadcast from those running the game was a simple and respectful “Wake Up”. I think alot about how a Matrix Online game, one bigger and better than before, could be brought into existance - and maybe sometime in the future someone will pick up the property again and give it a propper stab.

There isn’t much to say about this next video, chances are you’ve probably seen it. It’s a tiny snippet of gameplay for Modern Warfare 2, showcasing the custom kill streak loadouts. Ahem. Custom Kill Streak Loadouts. This is going to be amazing.

And the final peice of news I found is THIS. DJ Jazzy Jeff is going to be in DJ Hero. Now that might mean very little to the uninitiated, but allow me to define. “Jazz” as he is otherwise known shared the screen with a young william all those years ago in what may be the best television series of all time. Now if you’d like to take a minute, just sit right there, watch this video in Awe.

But as awesome as that is, I’m fucking not paying £120 for a DJ game. No Fucking Way.

I should admit that I have seen the Twilight film. It was horrible, but in a delightful lulzy way. Marty McWhyte linked THIS to me the other day and it’s a hilarious read, or a professional troll depending on your point of view. Personally, when it comes to the film, I have never seen a worse source of vampire lore - at points it eludes to the characters being more Generic Werewolf in origin, and yes… Vampire Baseball.

I think I said somewhere that I was going to talk about the mighty MTG in this post, but honestly I can’t be arsed. I’ve been building decks the past couple of days and I think I’ve got what I set out to build initially, save a couple of extra cards that I’ll pick up next week.

I’m oficially on holiday, though it hasn’t quite sank in yet. Tomorrow I’m hitting Fundee for a couple of days, to see the homies, maybe draft and whatnot. My usual Fundee hyjinks. Then I’ll be treated to my Driving Theory Exam next monday, which to this point I have done absolutely nothing to prepare - outside of a car. Then the rest of that week I’ll be tripping down to Edinburgh to savour the delights of the city and the Edinburgh Interactive Festival. There’s also the matter of the iPhone I purchased, that is currently on it’s way from O2, an experience I’m excited to share with the rest of you.

So here’s to the holidays. May my decks shuffle well, may the podcasts never end, and may I be moved into my room again by the end of the fortnight.

Je ne vous pense pas vous trust

I do… did, at the weekend.

It’s easily one of the best films I’ve ever seen. And I know I said that about Dark knight - but it’s better than that. It’s just so up there that it’s punching Star Wars in the shins. The ultimate mixture of being faithful to the original comic and the genre, to the pacing, to the slight storyline tweaks, the amazing soundtrack and audio, and the special effects that make Manhattan’s cock glow on more than one occasion. It’s a beautiful thing, and I haven’t felt such a way about a Movie since, The Dark Knight, but this is even way beyond that. I can’t wait for the BluRay.

In the spirit of seeing such an amazing movie, I picked up some new comics to add to the collection. Specifically: Books 3,4 and 5 of Y:The Last Man, Book 1 of Sandman, and Book 1 (Hardcover) of Gotham Central. I nearly got a complete set of Batman Cacophany - the Kevin Smith written batman books, but I couldn’t find issue 1 for the life of me. I’m continuing on with Y for the moment, but by the rate I’m going, I may have exhausted my new additions by the end of the week. I may also have a second chance to pop in and see watchmen again, this coming weekend. And at the same time I’ll probably stock up on even more comics. As a side note, I love seeing a bookself of mine that isn’t riddled with off-presents and things I bought but will never read.

I’m finding all the time for this, funnily enough, during EVE play sessions. Specifically Mining. With the patch incoming within the next 24 hours, I thought that I’d step up on production and get some ISK for my impending Alt. I’ve also been looking into Mining Corps to join up with - to get a bigger peice of the pie. It’s not as boring as it sounds - It’s truly an amazing sight to float my way into a 0.5 sec asteroid field and see an Orca surrounded by several Hulks and Retreivers, mining lazers blazing and drones orbiting.

The big patch hits tomorrow, and as you can see in the Patch Notes, there are a ton of awesome changes. I’m planning to Alt-up and properly go through the new tutorials and then through the epic story arc and then with some time into some of these new-fangled wormholes. All the while doing some mining.

Ofcourse my ultimate goal - which one must have in EVE, involves something that will be out in a later, legs included, expansion. More on that at a later date. For now, enjoy the new trailer…

I’ve had some amazing, post 11pm games in Killzone warzone. Why past 11pm? because my connection is still TOS’d. Regardless, I’m working my way slowly up the unlock ladder - and got my first taste of the engineer at the weekend. It’s a clever role - essentially similar though simpler than TF2’s counterpart. What’s better is that the matchmaking seems to be extremely effective, since I havent’ seen any other player with anything higher than Engineer unlocked.

I feel bad for the glut of other games I’ve yet to sufficiantly complete - but again I’ll blame my slow connection. Maybe I’ll get back to some of them next weekend.

I hut up the Bioshock 2 teaser site today - It stirs up emotions of two release calendars past. Check it out HERE and see if you can decipher anything out of the ordinary. The jist - weird lights in the ocean and big-daddy-like creatures are kidnapping little girls in the fashion of a bear from coastal towns. To bolster the ranks of the new little sisters perhaps? Great URL they grabbed there.

you belong to me I believe

There’s some great faggotry going down with Seth - Street Fighter IV’s “Final Boss”. Infact, it brings me back to yet another february, where I spent too much time getting angry with DoA4’s ALPHA-152 - who shares many similarities with Seth: They’re both blue, they both can teleport, they both have mondo-hit combos that take gigantic chunks out of your life bar, and they are both made up of the compiled moves and data of many world fighters.

They’re also both cheats. Intentionally. I finally beat Seth last night, but it took a helluva lot out of me - so much that it made the 15 second process of lose - accept continue - re-choose character - show flashy me vs boss screen - skip animation, near unbarable. There are droves of players out there on the net that are feeling the hurt of this and it’s extremely unacceptable - especially in a game that’s built on it’s balanced fighting system and legacy of honorable combat.

Though, that’s really the only thing I can see wrong about Street Fighter 4. It’s the most master-crafted fighting game I’ve ever played. And after my bouts - to the extreme plural - with captain wankery, my Ryu is pretty strong and as such, I’ve actually been winning fights on X-Box Live. It’s a Delight.

As a sidenote, I’ve been using my regular 360 controller instead of my SFVI Fightpad for most of my playtime. I’m actually more used to the analogue sticks than the weid floaty d-pad I got with the new controller. I find I play better with it. And at the end of the day, my thumb hurts less from constant Hadokening.

DoW2 Early Impressions
The other big game of last-weekend is Dawn of War 2. I didn’t play so much of it as I planned, but what I’ve seen so far has returned my faith in the RTS Genre. I think I’ll save my thoughts for when I have more to say. I was surprised to see that there are Achievements, like proper Microsoft Achievements, of which I already have hundreds of. List HERE. It’s a pretty decent list too, nothing too ‘out of reach’.

Eve Online, is a funny game for me. Whenever I see a trailer, it makes me want to re-download the game and re-subscribe, only to login, set a skill to train, and subsequently logout. My problem with the game is that I instantly lose my sence of direction whenever I login. I always said that I’d come back when they get the walking in stations stuff implemented (so I can open a virtual Bar ofcourse), but I think I’ll get in early for their next expansion. The prospect of them both revamping the character creation/new player experience and adding an epic overarching quest-line that will span the galaxy should in theory give me some of the direction I crave.

So yes, tonight I will download and install, then login, set a skill to train and then logout.

Today’s video is a small teaser for the new expansion set to hit on the 10th of March. (interestingly, wikipedia says that after this expansion, CCP will be stepping up production on the long-expected World of Darkness MMO. You don’t know how much I want that game)

I left a note on my twitter, but I should reiterate - Quake Live is Live. It’s Quake. It works through your browser. It’s free. That’s all you really need to know. Can’t get into the servers right now though, they’re totally getting raped. But you should hit up the link to register your account and whatnot. There’s a nice intro movie-tour that takes you through the features - and there’s some nice X-Box live kinda stuff in there - dynamic friends lists and awards.

This weekend the rents will be not within my area of space for somewhere between 24 and 48 hours. This will be awesome - I’ve already bought the nachos and cheeze and dip. Gathered an assortment of Rockstar Energy drinks. And got enough cash out of the machine to blaze a Chinese Takeaway Trail. In addition - I’ll have Killzone 2 and Halo Wars to play, along with SFIV, DoW2, EVE, and maybe a Hint of Quake Live. I’ve honestly been hoping I’d get the house to myself for a couple of weeks now - so I’m determined to make the most of it.

chicken supreme

Got back last night, super late, and I discover that the Blog is down… Again. I don’t want to bother writing up the details of my trip just yet, I want the blog to be back up first. And it’ll give me some time to hit up all the stuff that I missed the past week, and watch a week’s worth of TV, including the return of battlestar. So the timetable’s looking like postive post tomorrow, fueling up the hatredcopter on tuesday and then I make my way back to Fundee on wednesday. Hopefully.

Just some bits of news I picked up since I got back. Eye of Judgement’s set 2 seems to be properly out now, despite a lackluster appearance of actual cards in actual shops. From what I found out, the update costs £6.99 and adds some new features, and lets you use the set 2 product. I’m taking a huge guess here, but I’m guessing it’s going to be rather hard to find boosters at your local gaming establishment, so maybe once I’ve converted all this european funny-money lying about into good old GBP, I may satisfy my nerdly needs with a booster box. What’s really weird is that this update seems to be delayed until the end of the month for the US, who woulda thunk it?

CoD4 Map Pack is live, I think I’ll have to pick that up too once I get back.

My EVE online subscription has finally expired. I don’t mind really, I think I’ll wait to hit it up again once the next big big patch hits. I find the idea of owning a bar on a spacestation incredibly alluring. Yeh, THAT patch.

And it seems we may have finally got a release date for Rock Band in Europe. It’s looking like the end of next month for the 360 version only. Details HERE. Retail price is also looking roundabout £130, which sucks my fucking cock. I dunno, something feels a bit fishy about this. More as the story develops.

Is anyone else getting the vibe that GTA4’s almost here? You know, that feeling. Regardless, my game-boner is currently stoked for some EoJ action.

On the scrotum of a wizard in his testicle blood