Pagoda of Gaming

Just a little CYOTFS post before I hit the train to epic-failserboring.

I did some Pre-Holiday spending yesterday, and picked up some new PSP games for next week’s bore-fest. Patapon, Valkyrie Profile Lenneth and MGS Portable Ops. Porta-ops was a bitch to find, had to dumpster-dive it out of the pre-pwned along with Valkyrie Profile. Not that that’s a bad thing. Both in excellent condition for less than a £10 each. Impressions when I get back, though I’ve played the first level of MGS, and I’m VERY impressed so far.

Have you heard the bad news? Look’s like Warhammer Online’s been super-delayed until the Autumn. I was quite saddened at the thought of having one less fun thing to occupy myself during the soul-crushing summer. But then I remembered that I’m in the closed beta, and suddely I was less sad. And then I saw the contents of the Collectors Edition, then I got excited. So much cooler than an in-game pet. If you know what I mean.

I finally got to playing the Bad Company beta. I don’t want to say much, other than it’s good fun, incase the NDA my ass.

The EoJ Set 2 update is sortof out, atleast the patch version is. It doesn’t matter much anyways, there’s been reported delays accross all of europe for arrival of new cards. I’m not surprised.

Today’s video is something I stumbled on, at the PurePwnage site. Not bad.

So there’s going to be a new 50 Cent Game, a sequal. I’m entirely uninterested, until I saw the game’s plot. Check it HERE for the Lulz.

If this is my last post before the holidays, I’ll try and post some stuff when I’m there, I’m sure I’ll have found something about France to complain about in detail. I’m off to play some CSS before I have to leave. Cho.

Deutsche Deutsche!
Vaya con dios amigos!

*Hours Later*

So, If I had written this up last night I would’ve been pissed, I still am, but less. I got the obligatory “go get ready for your damn holiday*” from the ‘rents. It was not a happy phone call, to say the least. Now I’ve got to figure out where the fuck I go to get a haircut in dundee, ontop of all the other shit I have to do. To get to the point, I already know how much of a clusterfuck this holiday’s going to be. And how freaking bored I’ll be. (*Air Quotes timez one billion zomg this is my final form)

France? Seriously? Of all the non-speaking european countries in the world, you take me to France? The country where I already hate the language, hate the history, and hold greatest military achievement as a goddamn midget. Seriously? SRSLY?

Then again this could all be some sort of elaborate joke, they’ve certainly pulled it off before. But I don’t expect they would these days. It’ll be me one-on-one with france for a whole week, and all I’ll have is my PSP. Luckily, the place we’re staying at is said to have wireless internet access, which might keep me sane. Then again, I’ll believe it when I see it, and it is browsing with a PSP, which isn’t the best experience.

My second point of ranting, though this is a minor one. How fucking hard is it to make working beta keys for a 360 game? I would’ve had some fun this week if I had the battefield bad company beta on my side. I just learned of it today, and if they get round to sending me a WORKING beta key, my fileplanet account will have payed for itself a little bit more.

I’m happy to see a new Sonic game on the horizon. I think. Well, from the leaked footage, I can say that it looks better than anything they’ve tried since the dreamcast. A return to the “press right and occasionally press A” type of sonic is what the franchise has been needing. In the same way that Square needs to re-release FFVII on the PS3. And in the same way that Duke Nukem Forever needs to come out. You get the idea, it’s like a horseman of the gamepocalypse.

Keeping the ‘copter blades spinning, we have the bi-weekly Rock Band rant. YOU ANNOUNCE A FUCKING SHITTY WII* VERSION FOR FUCKING JUNE IN THE MOTHERFUCKING COLONIES! HOW ABOUT A CUP OF FUCKING CARE FOR EUROPE, HARMONIX! HAVE SOME FUCKING BUSINESS SENSE AND RELEASE HERE. HELL, HOW ABOUT A DAMN PROPER EXPLANATION? (*by “SHITTY WII” I mean that the Wii version of Rock Band will be shitty, and that the wii itself is shitty, two birds one stone, cocks).

On the same subject, I did something particularily emo last night, though it was not the intent, most likely through a Relentless caffine-haze. I had a fleeting thought that evolved into something greater. I wondered what it would be like to play Electric Six songs on Rock Band. I know, but one can dream, can’t they? I ended up compiling a list of the ‘best for Rock Band’ for the Six and the Prophets (that’s the emo part there). And believe me, I tried a Linkin Park list, that’s fucking hard mode. Take a look if you like, I’m sure that your internet-savvy self could compile a mp3 playlist and you might understand why I picked these particular songs. If it were ever to be real, and I know that I’m the cancer killing dlc, when I say this, but I’d pay £10 for that. (consider asterix’d songs to be the best of the best, in a track pack).

Gay Bar*
Synthesizer
Devil Nights
Vibrator
Night Vision
Slices of You
Germans In Mexico*
I Don’t Like You
Kukuxumushu*
Dirty Looks

Shinobi Vs Dragon Ninja*
Kobrakai
Awkward
We Still Kill The Old Way
Burn Burn*
Goodbye Tonight
We Are Godzilla, You are Japan
The New Transmission
Can’t Catch Tomorrow*
Heaven For The Weather, Hell For The Company

Today’s video is something Wingums sent to me, I lol’d so hard I headrush’d.

I see that them halo 3 maps are finally free. I’ll go have a big cup of CARE. Srsly, CoD4’s where it’s at now. *sigh* I’m still pissed. I’m gonna go hurt something. That might make me feel better.

nights with the devil driving around the CITAYYY!

(^ new online avatar I’m trying out)

Company Of Heroes finally downloaded, and is what I’ve been solidly playing the past couple of days. So much that it put my steam rating from a zero-point-something up to 4.8, I think that’s a good thing.

I’ve only played a total of two online games, and I sucked hard in both, which is expected. I think the matchmaking is a little broken, since it matched me against two seasoned vets. each time. I think I’d have more fun playing someone who was as new to it as I am, or someone I actually know.

I’ve been playing a mix of Americans and Brits, and none of the nazi armies, simply on principle. The brits in particular seem to be very interesting. I had a moment of revelation when I first realised how ‘defensive’ the army is with it’s super-powered emplacements. Then I devoted several AI skirmishes to a simple strategy of rushing the centre of the map then setting up a shitload of sapper-built turrets and howitzers. Which are, btw, the shit. I haven’t tried the artilary or engineer tech tree much, I find them innefective, and simply because the Commando’s tree has given me all that I have needed so far; glided in strike teams (which btw, is the coolest way I’ve ever seen to drop troops into battle), a nice artilery barrage and some neat surveilance options. So yeh, CoH is pimp, I just wish I had some noobs I could pwn online.

I might dive back into Bully for a bit tomorrow, play the as-intented version since it looks like the jim’ll-fix-it patch is out. And I’ve got a double dose of modern-made Western’s from LoveFilm still to watch before the weekend’s out; 3:10 to Yuma and Seraphim Falls. Then there’s always EoJ.

Today’s Video is the ‘trailer’ for the next EoJ expansion, which is looking very very interesting, it’s just a shame that I’m hitting france when it goes live, I expect I’ll be playing catch up when I come back. Anyway, take a look at the trailer. And as a final word, cloth mats are for noobs, pros leik me use masking tape.

I got a listen of the new Panic at the disco album, and I think after about 3 days, I’ve finally got an opinion. I don’t not like it. And I miss the emoness, quite a bit. In the way that there’s still nothing to better Camisado or any of the tracks on the first album. It’s like they all got stoned and decided it was the sixties. And I can’t stand how freaking slow the tracks sound.

In other weekend news, here’s a PAL PSN update list you can facepalm.jpg at. There’s finally a Sins of a Solar Empire Demo out, which I urge you all to try, details HERE. And it looks like we’re getting some free Halo 3 maps this tuesday.

into a place where thoughts can bloom

Before we get going, if anyone want to buy me an expensive, WoW-related, peice of gaming history and potential front-page-news murder weapon, THIS is what you can get me. Then, you know, I can lead an army of scourge and maybe make the world a more interesting place in the process.

I’ve never been one to play RTS’s and be into them, infact I’ve made it part of my new-years resolution to do so. My earliest forays into the genre were way back when I had to live with a 56k connection and the ‘family’ PC could barely run Age of Mythology, and before I saw the light that was Counter-Strike: Source. In this newer age, where the PC appears to me to be doing what it’s good at because it has to, in droves, if it is to remain a viable format. I approach each PC FPS or RTS that isn’t Valve-crafted with a feeling that I might just be wasting my money.

I saw the light last night, which may have been about 4am, when I played a single round of control point, battlefield style, and it suddenly clicked that I really liked it. I’ve had the feeling before, when I spend alot of time in the World In Conflict beta, I was just too poor and enfatuated with my new HDTV to afford delving further. Company of Heroes is the shit, and for all the time I’ve owned it, I’ve been doing it wrong. I’m happy that I finally get the chance to experience it properly.

Then I did something rather stupid. I love Steam, alot, some might say too much. Hell I’d buy every PC game I ever wanted on steam if they supported such a catalogue. So I saw CoH and it’s expansion pack for the UK price of £5 less than the expansion pack itself and I bought it. Long story short, Instant gratification isn’t so instant when you’ve got a shitty internet connection. Calculations lead me to a 10am tomorrow ETA of CoH itself. Worst part being I have the retail version in my hand and I can’t reainstall for fear of fucking up the steam version. Instead I spent alot of time over HERE, diving deeper into the strategy of the game, something that is unusually deep.

I spent more money today too, which I really shouldn’t but what the hell. I called the shopping trip a ‘Nerdventure’, a word I should use more often. I spent most of last night, whilst staring intently at CoH’s download percentage, ahem…. ‘archiving‘ most of the videos on my PC, using up all my blank DVDs, so I got another 50 in the bag. I also got the Werewolf the Forsaken book from Dundee’s best RPG stockist, something I’ve been after for a while.

Fear not my friends of flesh and bone, I couldn’t get you ‘into’ pen and paper RPG’s if I wanted. To bear my soul for a bit, now where did I put it?, I use these books to play out my own little mind-stories, that keeps me nice and sane. I hold the books in such high regard because it doesn’t force a story upon you, so much as you can with a little bit of self imagination, plop yourself into this fucked up world of Kindred and Uratha and suddenly the world seems alot more interesting. If you find yourself even partially interested in the lore, there’s a short and sweet Wikipedia article over HERE that should straighten things out.

To hit on some very special mid-week news, and what may be the thing that keeps me from selling my DS. Activision have finally unveiled their porta-guitar hero setup, and it’s looking like it’ll work. Check out the details HERE, and see a super-douchey video of the peripheral in action. Though I seem extatic, I remain slightly worried at acouple of details, the sound quality, the need for a guitar pick, only having 20 songs, and that things with the subtitle ‘on tour’ have gravely dissapointed me before, I’m looking at you SSX.

Console RTS’s seem to be the thang these days, in the way that it’s like building a sea-mine then hitting it over and over with a large mallet. Today’s video features the one I think might make it work. Unfortunatly, the video is ‘hosted’ by a bunch of the Frag Dolls, who might not be the best judges of Ubisoft games considering that ubisoft gives them free stuff and writes them large cheques. But if you can look past the broken side of game journalism for a second and enjoy the footage of what appears to be RTS actually working on a console, though there might be some windows movie maker magic involved, I’m sure you’ll be surprised. Just be ready to turn it off when the Frag Dolls beat a retarded, frothing at the mouth, horse to death with their ‘humor’.

In other news, I found THIS, and I chuckled. There really should be more Battlestar webcomics out there. Thanks for staying with the long post. Game boner officially stoked for Company of Heroes, funny, since I’ve owned it for over a year.

With a suitcase full of fire

As I went this evening to pick up my monday-night kebab, I couldn’t help notice that there was a hefty smell of paint-stripper in the air. Looks like it’s saint patricks day. Yet another excuse for the masses to get drunk and pretend that they’re irish. I’m not one of them, that make’s me happy.

My nostalgia trip continues, I can’t remember what started it. This time I’ve returned to Digimon, I’m partially embarrased to say. I have the movies and the first series downloading, and from what little I’ve watched, it still remains as exciting now as it did all those years ago. It seems that my throwback is well timed. There’s a Digimon MMO on the horizon, for americans atleast. To be honest, I would love for a Digimon resurgance.

Look’s like there’s atleast one smart person, well to some degree, running the brittish goverment. Check THIS out. I think we’re on even almost on even terms now. Me and the govenment that is. There are my dreams of a future where content is regulated for children by the parents, and not the government influenced by the zealos parents. I doubt that’ll ever happen. But what the hell do I care, I’m legal motherfuckers.

Thanks very much Harmonix for what’s looking like right now, our compensation for the late rock band release. Utter Pish. If there were two bands in the world I could erase from existance, off the top of my head, I would say Blur and Oasis. How about some real fucking compensation here, or a decent brittish rock band, or hell, a motherfucking release date! What really grinds my gears about this is that the amerifags are actually pissed off that they’re not getting these tracks. Uh huh.

Grats to Anonymus this weekend for what seems like another sucsessful anti sci-fag raid, as today’s video will show. As I was at home looking after the dog, my mother took time out of her trip to edinburgh to seek out the raid and get some fetching pictures of our favbourite internet superheroes in action. To be honest I nearly facepalmed out of embarrasment when she told me she actually talked to them and procured some informative leaflets.

I would’ve thought Anon would’ve been more ninja about it…. wait… no I’m really fucking wrong there.

In other news, LOL.

We know the game and were gonna play it